The show must go on

STORY BY Barney Quick| For The Republic • PHOTOS BY Carla Clark | For The Republic

A After a long and successful acting career, Jill Tasker returned to her native Columbus to be with her mother, who was beginning to show signs of dementia. Bringing joy and vitality to her mother in her last years inspired Tasker to begin a project of love centered on reawakening dementia patients’ inner spark. So far, she’s enlisted a variety of people to help with this endeavor, including other talented actors and a playwright.

Tasker said becoming a thespian was her goal from an early age, and she appeared in as many local productions as she could while growing up. The East High School graduate earned a Bachelor of Fine Arts degree from Boston University and then spent 30-plus years in New York and Los Angeles doing voiceovers and sharing the billing on Broadway with the likes of Joan Collins, Joanne Woodward and Cynthia Nixon.

So when Philip Kaplan, a New York-based playwright who has family experience with Alzheimer’s, heard of Tasker’s account of helping her mother, he wrote a play entitled “Losing Sandi.” In June 2023, a reading was staged at Helen Haddad Hall. Jan Lucas played Sandi, Maria Argentina Souza played Jill and Tasker’s husband, Doug Stender, played Tom. The reading raised over $15,000. A full production at the Crump Theater is in the works.

In 1996, she married fellow actor Doug Stender. Among his credits, is a recurring role as a judge on the television series “Law & Order.” He became impressed with Columbus during their visits with her family, and when he turned 70, Tasker expressed a desire to move away from New York City.

“I asked him where he wanted to live,” said Tasker. “He said, ‘Columbus.’” Tasker was growing concerned about her mother, Sandi Hinshaw.

Sandi was civically involved in the Columbus area, and with two co-owners, operated a Nashville, Indiana, shop called Victorianna’s. But she was showing signs of dementia.

Sandi’s parents suffered from it, as well as their siblings, so the timing couldn’t have been better.

“I didn’t want to have to come back in a crisis,” said Tasker.

Tasker and Stender transitioned from big-city existence to the Columbus pace of life quite smoothly.

“Columbus’s collaborative spirit is its superpower,” Tasker asserted. “If you express a desire to embark on a project, people step forward, putting you in touch with other people, saying, ‘I know who’s good at this.’” However, Sandi’s symptoms worsened during the pandemic.

“It wasn’t possible to take her anywhere, and she always loved shopping, and she adored jewelry,” explained Tasker. “I set up a mock store at home, and she’d pick up various pieces and ask, ‘How much is this?’ I’d tell her, ‘Tom’s treating you.’ The effect was extraordinary.

Alzheimer’s patients retain feelings from an experience long after the content of it.”

Sandi died in April 2022, and Tasker set about creating a support system, which led to bringing Music & Memory to town. Music & Memory is a nonprofit organization that certifies community institutions to curate personal playlists of dementia patients’ favorite music, which has been shown to spark their memory and cognitive clarity.

Tasker collaborated with Thrive Alliance on that project while becoming involved with Dementia Friends Indiana, which trained her to conduct information sessions with businesses, churches and other organizations.

She worked with Sue Lamborn, Thrive Alliance’s outreach and community relations manager, to help make Columbus a dementia-friendly city.

“We informed people about what dementia is and isn’t,” said Tasker.

“Forgetting your car keys is no big deal. Forgetting what your car keys are for is definitely a big deal.”

Alesa McQueary, life enrichment director at Silver Oaks Health Campus, offered to organize a pilot program in Silver Oaks’ memory care unit in November 2021, and Tasker incorporated the Sandi’s Closet concept in March 2022.

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“Residents were told they were going to do some Christmas shopping,” said Tasker. “We used the term ‘bills’ for the medium of exchange rather than ‘dollars,’ which we still do. Everything costs one bill. The residents showed each other what they got. I was told they later decorated their shopping bags.”

She now has a schedule of places for regularly setting up the “store.” She visits most facilities on a bimonthly basis, with some on a quarterly or monthly basis. Along with jewelry, she sets out other small items, as well. She gets the merchandise from several sources, including the internet, donations and good deals she runs across. She said her current top goal is to increase her volunteer base from the current five.

Thrive Alliance helped set Sandi’s Closet up in June 2023 at Bartholomew County Public Library. In December, the Voelz, Reed and Mount law firm sponsored a Sandi’s Closet event at the Upland Pumphouse.

Sarah Lanam, a Northside Middle School teacher, helped six students work Sandi’s Closet events as a community project. That looks to be an ongoing partnership. The entire array of activities is an act of love on Tasker’s part.

“Sandi’s Closet provides dementia patients with engagement with others, making choices and autonomy,” Tasker said. “And we spoil them rotten.”